Code of Conduct at the Queer Center Kassel

At the Queer Center Kassel, different people with different perspectives come together and interact with each other. To ensure that everyone's time here is as pleasant as possible, we have developed the following rules for our interactions. These rules apply to members and visitors as well as to staff and volunteers at the Queer Center. These rules are reviewed and updated regularly. This process can be initiated both internally and by external persons.

We are all responsible for our coexistence and interactions.

No place is always great for everyone. Nevertheless, we want to treat each other as respectfully and constructively as possible. It should be relatively self-evident to keep the rooms clean and tidy and to leave the center at least as we found it.

We observe and reflect on the individual and structural power and hierarchy relationships between each other, but also with regard to the center's structures. We take responsibility for our behavior and our statements. We take care not to jeopardize the existence of the Queer Center with our behavior or statements or the behavior or statements of our group within the framework of the Queer Center.

We reflect on our needs and desires and communicate them clearly in order to determine whether they can be met by those present or by the Queer Center. It is particularly important to deal with triggers and other interpersonal barriers in a sensitive and constructive manner. However, we do NOT expect (other) marginalized individuals to educate us about their experiences and realities without prior discussion. We speak attentively and mindfully with each other and reflect on our speech behavior. We realize that no form of communication is free of misunderstandings and strive to understand our counterparts.

We want to be understanding and patient with each other.

We meet people where they are. This means we do not expect prior knowledge from each other. We are all in a constant process of learning and unlearning that will never be complete. However, we do not have to endure everything. People have different abilities, energy levels, and capacities. We do not want to judge that. This also means that we all need different amounts of time for certain things.

We all make unintentional mistakes sometimes. Mistakes can and should be pointed out respectfully. If we hurt people, we take responsibility for it.

We respect self-definitions.

We cannot see people's positioning (e.g., gender, disability), so we respect their self-definitions. This includes talking sensitively about and with each other and respecting pronouns and names.

We respect the boundaries of others.

No means no, only an (informed) yes means yes.

We observe and respect the boundaries of others. This includes emotional boundaries. Among other things, this also means that we respect people's pronouns and names. We are therefore happy when people introduce themselves with their names and pronouns.

Interaction with each other is always based on consensus and agreement. This applies to any physical contact, for example, touching clothing, hair, etc. Emotional boundaries are also discussed. The same applies to our content and tone of voice (e.g., not overly familiar if this has not been agreed upon in advance).

We do not comment on people's bodies and appearance without being asked. We ask whether people appreciate compliments.

There is no general ban on nudity in the center. However, this may be agreed differently in individual formats. If nudity is to be expected in certain formats, this will be pointed out in advance so that people can prepare themselves.

We do not want to engage in (non-consensual) verbal or physical violence.

We want to treat each other with respect, appreciation, and kindness. Any form of violence, including verbal violence (e.g., belittlement, insults, shouting, manipulation, threats, etc.) has no place at the Queer Center.

Important! In the event of non-consensual physical violence, there is a clear structure for who calls the police and speaks to them.

We deal with injuries and conflicts responsibly.

There should be no place for non-consensual violence at the Queer Center. Reports of injuries and/or conflicts take priority.

In the event of physical injuries (e.g., cuts, fractures, etc.), we call 112 in good time if we are unable to help ourselves. If we treat a physical injury with the contents of the first aid kit, we report to the administration what we have taken from the kit so that it can be replenished.

If injuries, misunderstandings, or conflicts arise, we will first try to resolve them without involving the in-house security service or the police. If we are told that we have hurt others present, we will listen actively and take responsibility for our actions and statements. An awareness person can be helpful in dealing with injuries and/or conflicts.

We respect agreements about what stays in the room and what may leave the room.

Agreements and consensus are also important when it comes to data protection.

We only take photos after consulting with everyone who will be recognizable in them. If the photos are to be shown or published outside the room, this is discussed in advance. A photo can only be published if everyone agrees, and then only within the agreed framework (e.g., photos that have been agreed to be sent to a Messenger group will not also end up on social media).

We do not pass on information that people have told us in confidence.

We do not disclose without prior agreement who we have met at the queer center and what names and pronouns people there have used if this could expose them to strangers.

We do not pass on contact information (e.g., phone numbers or social media names of other people) without being asked.

We only bring animals after agreement.

This also includes assistance animals. We are aware that barriers can sometimes conflict with each other. There are various reasons why people cannot meet animals, such as fears or allergies. If a person needs or wants to bring an animal, this must be discussed in advance. If animals are present at the queer center, this will be announced in advance.

We treat minors responsibly.

We base our approach on the Youth Protection Act and the UN Convention on the Rights of the Child. This means that we do not give minors alcohol, cigarettes, or other substances. We also do not encourage sexual/romantic relationships between adults and minors. There is no place for grooming at Queeres Zentrum Kassel. It is important to treat minors responsibly and with care.

Different rules apply to different evening events with regard to the presence of minors. As a general rule, if minors are present, no recordings may be made of them without the explicit written consent of their legal guardians. Not all events at the Queer Center Kassel may be attended by minors.

In general, the Queer Center Kassel specifically targets adults and persons of legal age with its activities. We are not a general “18+” space, but we do not explicitly focus on the needs of children or young people.

Conscious consumption

No illegal substances may be consumed at the Queer Center. The Queer Center is also a smoke-free place. E-cigarettes, joints, hookahs, pipes, and other smoking products (e.g., incense sticks) are not permitted. These two aspects are important because we could lose the premises if we violate them. The Queer Center cannot be a “safer use” location.

Alcohol may only be consumed at the Queer Center by prior arrangement. It is also clearly indicated at the entrance to the center whether alcohol is currently being consumed on the premises.

We do not visit the Queer Center when we are under the strong influence of mind-altering substances. Even when we are under the (mild) influence of mind-altering substances, we are responsible for our actions and statements.

We want to treat each other with as little discrimination as possible and be critical of discrimination.

We are all socialized in a discriminatory society. Dealing with this is a constant process of unlearning that is never completely finished. We want to be aware of this and confront our own privileges, prejudices, and reflexes.

When dealing with discrimination, we recognize that explanations are not justifications. The reasons why discrimination occurs are therefore no justification for discriminatory behavior. Furthermore, intentions are not the same as effects—even if people have good intentions, the effect can be discriminatory and hurtful.

There are intersections between different forms of discrimination. Many people are affected by several different forms of discrimination. For example, Black women experience racism and sexism (this is also referred to as misogynoir), and trans* women experience sexism and transphobia (the term transmisogyny is used for this – these concepts can be expanded to transmisogynoir).

We do not doubt people's experiences of discrimination—this also applies to discrimination that takes place within the Queer Center. When we observe a discriminatory situation, we try to show solidarity. This includes asking the people affected how we can best do this.

Here is an alphabetical and incomplete list of forms of discrimination:

Ableism (discrimination against disabled people), Adultism (discrimination against young people), Ageism, Anti-Semitism, Anti-Slavism, Colorism (discrimination against dark(er)-skinned people), Fatphobia, Gadjé racism (racism against Sinti/Sinti*zze & Roma/Rom*nja), discrimination against intersex people, Islamophobia, classism (discrimination based on socioeconomic status/social standing), lookism, misogyny (hostility towards women & femmes) , misogynoir (hostility towards Black women and femmes), neocolonialism, queermysia, racism, discrimination against sex workers, sexism, transphobia, transmisogyny (discrimination against trans* women), xenophobia (discrimination against foreigners)...

We criticize all these forms of discrimination and want to avoid them.